Conversations with People who Hate Me

CONVERSATIONS WITH PEOPLE WHO HATE ME by Dylan Marron is based on his experiences prior to and while working on the award-winning podcast of the same name. In his author’s note, Marron explains that the book “tells the story of a social experiment I began a few years ago, the events that precipitated it, the mistakes I’ve made along the way, and the twelve lessons I learned throughout the process.” Each chapter, with headings like “Conversation is a Dance” or “Debate is a Sport,” describes one of those lessons. Throughout the text Marron promotes the ideas of letting go of stereotypes and striving to be a good listener. Readers may also be interested in his Ted Talk, (Empathy is Not Endorsement), the subject of chapter six. Marron rejoices at the democratization of social media and doing “away with gatekeepers, so now regular people like me didn’t have to wait for permission to speak their minds,” but also critiques the internet for rewarding a strategy of “be aggressive, seize on trending topics, provide all necessary context, keep it simple, and have an opponent.” Overall, CONVERSATIONS WITH PEOPLE WHO HATE ME is a thoughtful, introspective text. Some excerpts might prove useful as discussion starters for our upcoming work on civil discourse.